College

I am now a freshmen in college. Wow, I cannot believe it!!! It seems like just yesterday I was eating under the kitchen table dressed up like an Indian with my little brother. Now, I am experiencing something entirely new and different. I will admit, I was not excited about coming to college. I didn't want to leave home, leave my friends, leave my family, leave everything I have ever known.

Move-in day was not as tough as I thought it would be. The night before; however, was an entirely different matter. I cried, I worried, I pouted, etc. One of the things that got me through that night was seeing my friends. I was partially so upset that night because I had wanted to get together with my friends before I left, but they all told me they were too busy to come and hang out with me. However, what I didn't know was that they had a plan. My amazing friends came and surprised me with a going away get-together. They came and made me feel better. They came and made me realize that I wasn't going to lose all the friends I have always had. They came and made me realize that I wasn't going to college by myself. I was going to have my family, my friends, and most of all God, there to support me the whole way.

The morning of move-in day, I was a little teary, a little shaky, and a whole lot of nervous. My parents and 2 friends came for moral support. The drive to ECU was one full of laughter and fun. I had fun decorating my room, buying all of the "necessities" and making the place feel homey. I didn't cry when my parents left. I didn't cry when I went to lay down that night (though I was sure that I would).

Saturday came and went. My whole family came to school so that my siblings could see my room and see the campus. They took my roommate and I out to dinner, and then it was time for them to go. That was a hard goodbye to say. It felt so weird to watch them all pile into the van and wave goodbye to me. I wasn't going with them, I was staying here. I did cry that night. At that moment, I couldn't see why I had come, I couldn't see the positive experiences that I was sure to have. Then I started to pray. I asked God to never leave me nor forsake me. I asked Him to protect me and give me peace. I asked Him to help me live my life to the fullest and give all the glory to Him. He answered. I felt immediate peace. I knew I was going to be okay and I knew that I wasn't alone.

The first day of class came and I was excited because it was Chemistry. Chemistry is my major and I am an all out Chemistry nerd. However, I quickly became nervous walking to class that day. I have been homeschooled my whole life. My biggest class had 10 people in it. How was I going to fit in, how was I going to make friends, how was I going to do everything the professor asked me to do. I sat down in that class and immediately felt peace and understanding. I talked to the people around me, I understood the material, I knew I was going to make it. I knew that God was on my side and that all things are possible with Him.

I am still not entirely set on the whole "being away from home, family, and friends" yet. However, it is getting better day by day. I am plugging in to a christian ministry on campus, I am meeting friends, I am meeting other Chemistry nerds, and I am overall giving my college experience to Christ.

My life saying will always be: "Don't Let the 'But What If's' scare you from the 'I Will's' that make life worth living!" ~ Pastor Richard Mills, Faith Baptist Church, 4/2003! I can't let the things I am scared of, get in the way of the things I know I can accomplish!!!!